Today I want to talk about ‘performance anxiety’. This is a big challenge that a lot of men face and prevents them from not only approaching women but also stiffening up and blowing themselves out of the interaction. In my earlier days I suffered from ‘performance anxiety’ a lot, even though I was at the stage where I had some success.
‘Performance anxiety’ can be described as, “insecurity and neediness within you”. At some level even when we know what we are doing with women, we still value her approval. This approval seeking stems from insecurity and this insecurity causes neediness and being needy is not not attractive. Women want strong independent men who can connect with her on that level, but wont base their there self worth on how she reacts to them. This is ironic as wanting her approval will in turn not allow you to have it. So why do we seek it???
‘Performance anxiety’ shows up when you go into an interaction and start focusing on how she is reacting to you while attempting to impress her. Trying to impress people/women always comes off as insecure and needy and this puts a burden on you to be TOO CAREFUL in you’re communication. You can’t just relax and be yourself. You MICRO MANAGE every little thing you say and every little gesture that you make as to elicit a positive response from her.
‘Performance anxiety’ can be described as an ANXIETY TO PERFORM. Listen carefully to me when I say this. “YOU ARE NOT GOING INTO INTERACTIONS TO PERFORM“!!! When you approach a girl in the street, you are there to interact and connect as normal human beings. You are the man and she is the woman. You have you’re place and she has hers.
Show up, be the person that you are, and if it doesn’t work out, so what! You learned something and over time you will become more attractive through practice and self reliance.
I go into even greater detail and explain not only what to do but why it actually works. When you have this deeper understanding of the principals of picking up and the reason why we actually do specific things. You then develop the freedom to do whatever you want because you understand the why behind it all and it guides you in what to do.
I hold regular day game boot camps and private coaching sessions and would love you to join me.
visit the official website: www.daygamedating.com.au
